IKIGAI - The Japanese Secret to a Long and Happy Life

Mahal harga buku ni... 😜

Buku ini dipinjamkan oleh seseorang kepada aku. Selama 6 tahun aku kenal dia, tak pernah sekalipun dia bagi aku apa-apa buku macam ni untuk dibaca. Walhal dia tahu aku paling susah untuk fokus baca buku. Dalam bermacam tanda tanya di dalam kepala aku sebab out of sudden dia suruh aku baca, aku ambil jugalah buku ni and try baca. Dia bagi pinjam buku ni since 12 September, nak dekat sebulan baru habis baca wakakakaka. Tidak mempunyai banyak muka surat, hanya 174 pages sahaja. Style bacaan aku memang lambat sebab aku baca word by word 😂

By the way, dari cover buku ini "Ikigai - The Japanese Secret of Happy Life". Tidak perlu aku kupas satu persatu isinya. Dapat aku faham maksud tersirat orang itu cuba sampaikan. Dipendekkan cerita, buku ni basically menekankan yang everyone should have their purpose of life. The reason you wake up everyday. Achieving, accomplishing etc... etc... Which is absolutely correct!

Mungkin sebab dari mata kasar, aku ni macam takde purpose of life wakakakakkaka.... yeap kadang-kadang macam jugaklah 😏 Well, while reading this book I strongly think that not everyone will have same journey. Ada yang lambat, ada yang smooth. Lambat tidak bermaksud not successful, it's "not yet" successful. 

Semua manusia mempunyai impian dalm hidup. Dalam mengejar impian, jangan lupakan apa yang ada di depan mata. Keluarga, rakan terdekat, rakan sekeliling, rakan sekerja blablabla.... Hidup ni lebih pada sifat bertolak ansur, saling memahami, willing to evaluate and to take initiative to understand before judging. Do not always come to conclusion. Life is not all about guidelines as written in books. Do not let your life be directed by books like robots. We are human and we should try to look, feel, understand and take a step back, relax before come to conclusion.

Friendship, relationship is something that you have to feel. To get that feel, you have to willing to know others opinion too. Jangan syok sendiri by thinking that you are always right. Friendship and relationship will never work like that. It's about give and take. Give opportunity to yourself to listen to others. Kadang-kadang ada banyak benda yang kita nak cakap, nak luah.... TAPI!!! belajar untuk mendengar dan memahami. 

Aku faham semua orang eager untuk mengejar cita-cita tapi bagi aku, aku ada keluarga dan kawan-kawan untuk aku luangkan masa. Mereka yang sentiasa menyokong dan mendorong aku. Mendengar dan sama-sama ketika susah. Biarpun aku tidak serius macam orang lain dalam mengejar tujuan hidup, tapi aku bahagia dengan hidup aku. Tidak semua, tapi aku bahagia sebab dalam sedih, gembira, kecewa, aku tidak sekalipun berseorangan. Mereka sentiasa di sisi.

Sering aku fikirkan jika aku terlalu serius mengejar impian, surely aku tiada masa untuk diluangkan untuk orang-orang yang aku sayang dan yang menyayangi aku. Jika satu hari aku sudah berada di puncak tapi tiada siapa di sisi untuk sama-sama meraikan, apalah makna kejayaan itu. Kejayaan adalah perkara yang patut dikongsi, bukan menjadi bongkak semata-mata.

Biarlah aku dengan pace aku, aku sentiasa percaya Allah sudah tentukan apa yang terbaik untuk setiap orang, rezeki masing-masing. Bukan bermaksud aku tidak buat apa-apa, tapi biarlah aku atur sendiri cara hidup aku mengikut kesesuaian  hidup aku. yang penting aku happy.

Serius sangat pun, tidak mempercepatkan apa-apa. 

Happy itu sesuatu yang subjektif. Mungkin perkara A adalah benda yang buat aku happy, tapi bagi orang lain benda tu tidak bermakna apa-apa. Begitu juga jika orang lain rasa perkara B adalah perkara yang sangat berguna, tapi mungkin aku rasa benda tu tak bahagiakan aku. Bahagia itu terpulang pada diri kita sendiri. Jika sesuatu perkara itu adalah perkara yang membahagiakan kita, maka perkara itulah yang berguna dan bahagia untuk kita. 

"Level dan makna bahagia bagi tiap-tiap orang adalah berbeza dan tidak sama."

Well dear someone, thanks bagi pinjam buku ni. Banyak info yang saya dapat. Jangan risau, saya ada purpose in life just that not too obvious to show to others hehe... 

Ok ni saja nak bagitau buku dipinjamkan pakej dengan penanda buku sekali haha... 

Ceritera Family Short Trip Ke Manila, Philippines

 (View sunrise daripada tingkat 48, Malate, Manila, Philippines)

Mulanya terasa ingin menulis dalam bahasa english, tapi memandangkan bahasa tunggang langgang dan khuatir maksud tidak sampai maka baiklah ia ditulis di dalam bahasa Malaysia hehe.

Pada 9  hingga 11 Mac lepas kami memilih Manila, Philippines sebagai destinasi percutian keluarga. Mulanya agak keberatan kerana sering dimomokkan dengan pelbagai cerita negatif berkenaan negara itu. Namun, ada baiknya melihat sendiri keadaan di sana daripada hanya mendengar cerita orang lain. 

Di sini aku ceritakan sedikit pengalaman yang ada. Cerita ini tidak merangkumi semua kehidupan di sana, mahupun meliputi seluruh penduduknya. Hanya segelintir yang aku nampak di depan mata.

Kami menetap di kawasan bandar. Lebih spesifik, di Malate. Hotel tersebut terletak di tengah-tengah bandar. Hanya beberapa langkah berdekatan dengan Robinson Mall Manila. Manila adalah sebuah bandar yang amat padat. Keadaan trafik yang amat sesak. Di atas dua lane jalanraya boleh memuatkan 4 kereta yang berhimpit sesama sendiri namun menariknya tidak berlanggar 😅.

Tidak dinafikan sukar untuk mencari makanan halal dan sesuai dengan selera Mak aku (tu yang penting 😆). Mak memang sedikit cerewet dengan makanan, tapi maklumlah selera orang tua. Difahami. Alhamdulillah mak berkenan dengan makanan di restoran arab yang beroperasi 24 jam "Shawarma Snack Centre". Restoran terletak dalam 15 hingga 20 minit dari hotel. 

Sepanjang berada di kawasan tersebut, aku melihat pelbagai jenis kehidupan. Baik siang ataupun malam. Pagi hari kedua, kami hanya berjalan kaki untuk membeli sarapan pagi di Shawarma. Sepanjang perjalanan pergi dan balik, ada bermacam jenis orang dan kehidupan. Ada yang sudah memulakan kerja menyapu dan membersih jalan raya, kaki lima dan sebagainya. Tidak kurang yang tidur bergelimpangan di kaki-kaki lima, hadapan kedai, bank dan di lorong-lorong jalan laluan kereta. 

(beberapa gambar diambil secara rawak dan tidak jelas)

Aku tidak berkesempatan mengambil gambar kehidupan di malam hari kerana agak membahayakan. Namun aku ada melihat beberapa lelaki mengarahkan beberapa wanita mengikuti lelaki-lelaki yang berkemungkinan pelanggan mereka.

Pengalaman melancong di luar negara bagi aku bukan hanya melihat pemandangan yang indah dan menakjubkan tapi aku juga ingin melihat sendiri bagaimana mereka menjalani kehidupan seharian, budaya mereka dan sebagainya. 

Gambar-gambar yang dipaparkan di atas tidak bertujuan untuk mengaibkan mereka tapi aku kongsikan untuk mempamerkan betapa kita dijadikan di dalam pelbagai jenis kehidupan yang berbeza-beza. Kehidupan itu ada sisi baik dan buruknya. Ada yang mampu diubah, ada yang sudah redha dengan takdirnya, ada yang masih tetap berusaha untuk meningkatkan taraf hidup, ada yang berkali-kali gagal masih juga percaya satu hari nanti kehidupannya akan berubah, ada yang tidak pernah gagal dan melihat orang di bawahnya sangat kerdil dan hina kerana berlainan tarafnya, ada yang menganggap orang yang gagal dan miskin itu hina walhal kehidupan kita dikelilingi cerita yang berbeza-beza. 

Siapa pun kita, usah merasakan diri sendiri adalah insan yang paling bertuah, kaya, bertaraf tinggi atau sebaliknya merasakan diri sendiri sebagai miskin, hina, gagal dan tidak akan pernah berkesudahan baik. Rahsia Allah itu indah. Kadang kita di atas, akan datang masa surutnya untuk kita berada di bawah pula dan kadang kita di bawah, jika rezeki diizin Allah akan tetap berada di atas. Sentiasa beringat mati itu pasti, taraf, kecantikan dan kekayaan itu sementara dan kesusahan dan kepayahan tetap ada hikmahnya. InsyaAllah.

Who Moved My Cheese?

This book contained only 94 pages. Very thin and small in size BUT it knocked my head a lot.

It categorised the character into 4. Sniffs, Scurry, Hem and Haw. Each name carries a different character which we can relate to our life and attitude. 

"Sniffs who is faster to sniffs out change early, scurry who scurries into action, Hem who denies and resists change as he fears it will lead to something worst, or Haw who learns to adapt in time when he sees changing can lead to something better."

Well, it's hard for us to admit which real character suits us specially when we are categorised either Hem or Haw. It's true and expected that we are always in denial as we always think that we are good.

It does not only applies to our own self but to everyone. Each character in this book is exist and we need to recognised ourselves and the important thing is it's never too late to change for good things. 

On our our journey in life, this book visualise it as if we are running in a maze looking for a cheese. Either we are willing to go out from comfort zone and keep looking for the new cheese or keep waiting for the cheese which was cease to exist and stick with what we believe and staying there and rotting away.

I rephrased the story by giving example in one organisation:

A = Boss who always demanding changes (sniffs)

B = Employee with good motivation and easily adopting changes (scurry)

C = Employee who always believe that he is right, work harder and no changes is necessary (Hem)

D = Employee who used to think he did right thing but later on able to realise that he need to change (Haw)

In work, it is normal that A will always demanding for changes to improve business and generate profit in any great way possible which A expecting B, C & D to adopt and to change.

As what was written in the book, almost all employee will resist and refuse to agree new rules and new idea as it will be requiring them to move out from their usual habits.

However, there is always a B. Who will rush into adapting changes and act towards the idea of changing. Probably B has nothing to worry, the changes has no effect on his life etc. So B will be flexible enough to adopt. OR it is just B character.

BUT, C will not be happy. C might be affected so much by the changes imposed. Either in usual work routine or in emotion. C has failed to identify the significance of changes as he think that what he has been doing for the past years is good enough to survive. No one is trying to persuade him that changes is necessary. Slowly C will drained out, job burn out, low motivation or even zero motivation to work. Productivity will never appear anymore.

While D is in 50 - 50. He used to think like C. But slowly when he managed to evaluate and trying too see things in different angle, he is able to adapt to changes. Slowly but surely.

In this context, I am in the opinion that no one should be blamed. Although from the character, we could see how strong Hem resist to changes but A should play a very important role. The ability of C in any area might be far different from A but A should lead everyone to be together. That is how team should work the things out. A shouldn't be expecting C to adapt to changes in a split second. A should be able to make C understand why changes is needed in the organisation.

Most important thing is we should always put others condition and ability into our shoes first before judging. IF let say A trying his level best to lift C up together with B & D, then C should also trying to understand and adapting the changes required.

It is undeniable that changes for the best is necessary all the time BUT together with that changes we have to plan and discuss the necessary steps to reach the goal TOGETHER.

Blaming each other came from attitude. It will be never ending until we can sit, relax and think calmly what was happening. Slowly catching up to adapt the changes in situation. Do not push to hard or otherwise every effort will just fade away and burn out.

Assuming a journey of life as running in the maze is an interesting thing to imagine. Even though we might be losing our way in the maze, we have to be brave and not to think too much. 

Do not afraid of what is going to happen, enjoy every moment, do not ever regret what was happened in the past. 

Good things in the past will remain as a good memory. Bad things also will remain in a memory as a lesson and not to repeat that in the future. All things happen for a reason and it depends on you how to colour your life and future.

Life is short to regret. Enjoy while you can. Do the best in every angle. Do not push too hard to be like others. You are unique in your own way and God specially created you for a very good reason. Always keep that in mind. 

13 Things Mentally Strong People Don't Do...

Recently, I've been reading motivational books. Since last year, I'm suffering from emotional pressure. Like everything went wrong. I was scolded numerous of times by everyone I felt. I have to admit that I was not able to focus on my things. It's just all went wrong. 

Early last month on January 2019, due to never ending emotional pressure from everywhere, I was decided to leave for short trip. I booked flight ticket for next day flight. 

After work, I rushed to the Airport for KL from Kota Kinabalu (KK). Once arrived, I am ready for check in. When handing over my documents to the flight check in staff, they was showing me a weird look and informed me that the flight is from KL instead of KK. My tickets was all wrong. Not one way, but return tickets. I'm blanked. I do not know what am I supposed to do. To change ticket also very expensive. I have to buy new return tickets. I stand somewhere in the Airport. I'm not able to think of any solution.

After about 20 minutes, I have decided to buy new return ticket. I have no choice as the ticket counter also about to close. I just can't stay in KK for now. I really need to leave. I called my non-biological sister in KL. She was expecting me to arrive at 8.45pm that day. She was shock when I told her the story but she's trying to calm me down. She advised me to be calm, accept the things happening, relax and do necessary action to settle the flight tickets things. 

She was graduated in psychological course (I don't know exactly what that course suppose to be named). She has that words soothing and calming. She always able to calm me down. Very patient in listening to my complains etc. I am thankful to have her beside me in all difficult situation. I feel relived after that and bought the tickets again.

As I walk around the Airport, I saw a bookstore. I glance through almost each and every rack in the bookstore until I saw 1 book which written on it "13 things mentally strong people don't do". I read some of the content and it's interesting. I decided to buy it. I kept reading until I reach KL. I can't wait to flip to another page. Each wordings affect me so much and I didn't realise that sometime I keep nodding in agreeing to the words that I'm reading. It's so motivating. I can feel it's real as it was written by someone who experienced a terrible and massive life challenge. I feel fresh as I compare my life challenge to the writer's life. The feeling is different. Like some heavy and big stone being removed from my head and eyesight. I am able to see things clearly, started to examine what's happening around me. Evaluating the things in different angle. 

That moment, I feel renewed. I wont allow outsider to decide what am I, what am I capable of. I wont allow them to read my mind. I will decide all of that because this is my life and it's my own decision. As I think back, there's a lot of thing in me influenced by others. My happiness likely depends on certain person and certain act.

I now realised that I can't force people to accept me, to think about me, to recognise and to see what am I doing. I cant ask a person to see how important and precious I am supposed to be. I will no longer allow idiotic act to happen but I will not regretting the things that I've done in the past also because I know I did not do that for recognition but that is how I treated the person I care and how I treated the person who no longer within my attention. I'm shoooooing away all those negative things.

Among wordings that affect me a lot is....you are responsible for your own happiness. It is your decision whether one's act influenced you in any way. Others is not supposed to be responsible for your unhappiness. It's true!